October 22nd, 2003
Nearly given up, the ghost has been. With the launch of the Antioch Forever web site, Phal and I have decided to try to phase out this site, as it’s become a bit unnecessary and remained a bit unknown. This will be different from the time we tried to faze it out by calling its mother ugly things. The plan is that the more interesting content will be transferred to the community web site—and in fact, most of it is already there, alongside some new stuff—and that future updates to this one will become either less frequent or less coherent (this last part of the plan isn’t generally regarded as possible, but ehh, it was getting late, and we wanted to get home before Letterman’s monologue...).
Assuming that we are breathing our last breaths here, we ought to look back on all of our accomplishments from nearly two years of eastern–western nonsense. Namely, we said “fuck” or some variant thereof 94 times. Er, 95. That’s nothing to scoff at. Or nothing to fuck at (96), as some might be inclined to say. Clearly, we would. We’re talking everything from your standard issue “fuck” (97) to the elegant “fucking” (98). Groundbreaking new implementations such as the delightful “DIEMOTHERFUCKERDIE” (99) and the simply magnificent “tymotherfuckingphoon” (100!). The utterly divine “SiRfUcKaLoT” (101), the positively rapturous “fuckedy fuck fucker fucking fuck-shit motherfucking fuck fuck” (102, 103, 104, 105, 106, 107, 108, and 109). Any and all variants of “mother-fucker” (110). With the hyphen. Without the hyphen. A fuck (111) for every man, woman, and fucking (112) child who visited the page, plus another hundred or so for good fucking (113) measure. Over 64 pages, that’s an average of 1.77 instances of the word “fuck” (114) per page, a statistic that has already been made irrelevant by this very fucking (115) page. Fuck (116), we’re good.
It’ll be sad to see us go, what with us being the cultural nexus of the Antioch community and all. If the previous paragraph failed to convince you of this, then consider:
- Where else are you going to find Edgar Allan Poe’s “The Raven” in its entirety? The VSP web site? The WASTE site that Adrian wishes people would just forget about and stop linking to?
- This very update began with a quotation by either Shakespeare or Yoda.
- Passages have been written in the styles of William Shakespeare, William Faulkner, and William Smith.
- There was a “Best Music of 2002” feature at the end of last year.
- We have a literature section, and one of the stories has an introduction inspired by the great Pindaric odes and choruses of classical Greek dramatic tradition.
- I just used the phrase “great Pindaric odes and choruses of classical Greek dramatic tradition.”
What more do you want? A fucking limerick?